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The A-Holes

Is ‘Guardians of the Galaxy’ Going To Be That Good?

There’s a lot of hype out there for ‘Guardians of the Galaxy’. But is it really going to be that good, or is this going to be more painful than ‘The Hulk’?

The A-Holes

Seriously, when telling people how tough I am, I let them know I sat through The Hulk with Eric Bana. Twice. Admit it: that’s impressive.

I was so excited for the ‘Guardians of the Galaxy’ trailer. I’m a novel reader (well, audiobook listener), so I don’t put a lot of time into comics, and when it comes to superheroes, it’s the movies for me. I’m there opening weekend for Iron Man, Thor, and I’ll be there for Captain America. So I sat in anxious anticipation for the GotG trailer. The fifteen second teaser came out and I was thrilled–it’s action packed, it’s expressive, it’s intense, but there were no words, there wasn’t anything to really explain what it was about.




And then I saw the real trailer.

With every passing second, my smile faded. With every character introduction my heart slowed, until the end, when I was practically sneering.

It. Looks. Stupid.


Does anyone else share my discomfort? Are there any other concerns out there that this movie isn’t going to hold up to Marvel’s fabulous line up so far? The special effects look awesome, that doesn’t change anything, but the banter is killing me. The crank bird? Really? And what are the writers trying to do with the legendary outlaw? Did they miss all four Pirates of the Caribbean movies spanned out over like the last decade?

“Who are you?”
*dramatic pause* “Star-Lord.”
“Star-Lord, man. Legendary out law? Forget it.”

Sometimes, it’s OK when movies don’t take themselves too seriously. A movie can get away with little inside jokes, industry jokes, and some absolutely crazy, ridiculous, ‘where-in-the-crap-did-that-come-from?’ takes:


Who Throws a Cupcake


Cameos that poke fun at the franchise or fandom are always enjoyable:


greatest show ever

However, this doesn’t just look like a few jokes here and there, but the entire movie looks like a joke. Not a good joke, like how Tony Stark can be snarky and get away with it, but like the director wanted to be liked so he let everyone just joke around and deliver lines like they wanted. Sometimes, that works out, but usually those are comedies. When you’re working an already established franchise, shouldn’t you take yourselves a little more seriously?

It’s worrisome. Star-Lord freaks out over someone listening to his music? He gives up fights immediately? He just doesn’t seem…funny. I expected more out of this. It’s fine if the characters don’t take themselves seriously, but they should at least treat their job–be it smuggler, outlaw, or all around bad-ass with some sense of dignity. There doesn’t seem to be a lot of dignity here, just lame ass jokes.

I’m hoping (beyond hope, even) that this trailer just sucked it up. That maybe whoever thought this trailer was a good idea was stupidly too close to the project and thought that this would be a great laugh. Several people do think it’s funny, but I consider myself relatively mainstream, and I didn’t think so. Maybe I’m so far flung into British television that American cinema is losing it’s appeal. I don’t like to think that’s the case, as I’ve loved everything Marvel has released recently and just re-watched all the X-men movies with sacrosanct like reverence in anticipation of the newest installment. Nothing from this trailer educated the audience about what this story is going to be about. I already have my suspicions, but it would have been nice to have some confirmation. Instead we were given, well…


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